facts or feelings?

among my many rss feeds today i came across this post from Sarah’s Dandelions:

would you rather . . .?
Have people tell you the truth, even if it’s hard to hear?


Have people lie to you, to make you feel better?


below you can read my response which i also posted in the comments section of her blog and i’d like to know your response.


the truth. (it seems like an easy answer to me because of my personality)

but in reality i think the problem comes in that what some people say the truth is actually isn’t; it’s merely opinion.

sometimes it is the truth even though it may be hard to hear. such as “the truth is . . . you can’t afford this house, you just don’t make enough money.” this statement does have some opinion mixed in (the opinion of what are sensible/responsible financial limits in regards to debt, standard of living, etc) but there is also facts of the house cost X amount of dollars, you make Y amount of money and the numbers don’t match.

other times the stated fact is mostly opinion with little or any facts. such as, “the fact is abe you’re preaching is horrible! you sound like charlie brown’s teacher, no one could ever get any inspiration from anything you say.” now someone could start saying these things about me and very truly believe them. they might even get other people to agree. they might even get the majority of people to agree. but in reality it is still mostly an opinion based on the hearers likes/dislikes in preaching style, attention span, and/or judgement of me as a person.

so then it comes down to knowing who is making the statement, what their motive is, and then deciphering how much of what they say is based on facts and how much is based on opinion.

if someone is making a statement mostly on opinion then i’d rather hear things that make me feel better. after all if it’s just someone’s opinion why do i care to hear they’re hurtful remarks. but if their statements have some facts/truth to them i’d like to know it. otherwise, how will i ever change, improve, or avoid danger?

as i heard my dad say once, “there’s no need to argue. if you’re right, then the truth will be known eventually. if you’re wrong, then you better shut up.” now i’m not sure if i’d go so far as to wholeheartedly endorse that statement, because on both sides of an argument each side thinks “they’re right!”


anyhoo, those are my two cents. i look forward to reading yours.

// today i’m thankful for:
1. rss feeds
2. my jaw feels better
3. life choices banquet tonight
4. nice weather today
5. pretty fall leaves

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