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Sometimes at FamilyLife we receive requests for help and in our flesh  we’ll wonder, “Is there really hope for this marriage?” Consider one wife who contacted FamilyLife with this email:

“I am unsure if you can help with this question but my husband and I have been married for just over a year and have some very serious issues. These issues showed up before marriage but, of course, have only seemed to get worse. 

I grew up in a verbally and physically abusive household and so did he. I can be very harsh with my tongue and say things that my husband doesn’t like by saying he doesn’t make enough money or cursing at him. 

He tells me to stop it and if I don’t he becomes very aggressive and will block me leaving the room, push me, spit in my face, grab me by the hair, and start calling me names and telling me how I need to respect him.

I am definitely not innocent and am trying to work on taming my tongue but am very concerned about my husband being physically aggressive as he seems to not be able to control himself in these moments. I am also concerned as we have an infant son who I am scared will learn that this is normal behavior. Any advice on what we should do to resolve these issues would be greatly appreciated.” 

It would easy to simply shrug our shoulders, shake our heads, and give a trite answer like, “We’ll be praying for you”, but in our hearts not really believing anything will change. 

But praise be to God who is still in the business of changing hearts and rescuing souls! He is still “able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us…” (Eph 3:20, ESV)

One of FamilyLife’s ministry advisors responded to the wife who wrote in. And although we don’t yet know the rest of her story, we do know that God has transformed marriages like hers in the past, and by faith we know He is able to do it again.