Oct
6
2009
abelara
there’s all kinds of names for it, but there’s no way around it. this world runs on money.
so it’s no surprise that in marriage, it’s a HUGE topic. and sometimes, shall we say, “heated discussions” ensue. there’s lots of different ways i could discuss the issue of money in marriage, but i’ll focus on the practical.
1) don’t be afraid to talk about how your parents spent money.
that’s right, i said your parents. it’s easy for accusations to fly, and feelings to get bruised when we’re discussing how our spouse spends, or defending how we spend. but it’s not quite so personal to talk about how our parents viewed money when we were growing up. and in doing so it gives your spouse a lot of insight into why you make the decisions you do.
2) find help
although most of us are far wealthier than we think are compared to the rest of the world, we could all use some advice in the area of finances. and there’s no excuse for not finding that advice. there’s books, cds, podcasts, blogs, websites, and software all dedicated to helping you get “on track” when it comes to your finances. if you have now idea where to start go to www.daveramsey.com and click the link at the top of the page titled “new to Dave Ramsey?“
3) know where your money is going
“budget” is not a four-letter word. and it doesn’t mean “not spending”. it simply means knowing where your money is going before it’s gone. DO IT!! whether you do it on paper, in a spreadsheet application, or some fancy computer software, DO IT!! (and do it together with your spouse)
4) be generous
even Ebenezer Scrooge didn’t want to be known as a scrooge by the end of the story. and in all honesty, i’m not even throwing this one in because Deb and I are currently in a process asking people to support our ministry with FamilyLife. even if you aren’t or don’t want to give to our ministry, we still want you and your spouse to be generous people. and save the excuses for why you’re not, i’ve heard them all. you’ll thank me later. be generous.
if money issues are a source of tension in your marriage, then you owe it to yourself, your spouse, and you kids to figure this money stuff out, and get on the same page. whether this is the first advice you’ve received on marriage, or if you’ve already been through
FPU and just needed a refresher course i hope this has nudged you and your spouse in the right direction.
no comments | tags: budget, generous, giving, marriage, money, talk | posted in marriage
Jul
20
2009
abelara
on this episode of the podcast: divorce sucks (www.postcardsfromsplitsville.com mentioned), and our kid’s generosity and our example to them.


ep. 4 - divorce sucks [19:12m]:
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2 comments | tags: budget, divorce, generosity, kids, podcast | posted in life and family, podcast
Jan
17
2009
abelara
i recently wrote on twitter about having figured out how much money we’re putting towards our debt – a whopping 45% of our net income. and then an additional 13% of our net income goes towards tithes and charity work. so essentially we’re living on only 42% of our net income.
a couple days later i got this message via twitter from our friend sarah johnson:
shocked that @abelara hasn’t replied to @lauraanna’s twitters. abe, your slipping. ;)
so what exactly did @lauraanna say?:
@abelara That’s great you’ll be debt free!
@abelara Although I don’t think it’s right to be proud of living on less when you don’t pay your own housing, food, medical expenses.
@abelara just a thought …
so then i replied to @sarahsdandelion:
@sarahsdandelion they musta slipped past me. i hadn’t seen/read them until you mentioned it. thanks for the heads up. :)
so now that i’ve given you a recap for those who don’t currently use twitter, (go ahead and sign up, i know you wanna.) or for those of you who use twitter but don’t follow either @sarahsdandelion or @lauraanna i’ll now commence with my reply to the thought about my pride and income.
Continue reading
6 comments | tags: budget, debt, money, pride, spending, twitter | posted in random stuff